November 4th...hurry up already.

Ok.

I watched the "final debate" tonight between Senator John McCain and ol' what's his name.

Now look. I'm a Republican. I make no apologies about that. And I honestly think there are a lot of wonderful Democrats in the world. Some of them happen to be my dear friends. But honestly guys...is Barack Obama the best you could come up with? Seriously?! Come on now. If HE is the best and brightest your party has to offer, that's like saying he won a gold medal at the Special Olympics...guess what...he's still fucking retarded.

In fact, I think on November 4th...if you have the ability to walk into that voting booth...and honestly press "Senator Barack Obama (D, IL)" for PRESIDENT. I think there should be a midget underneath that booth that punches you directly in the balls. (or for you women...I don't know...bites your toes or something generally awful)

I'm done ranting because I just realized I somehow mentioned retards, midgets, AND Barack Obama in one blog post. That is wild.


Out here,

The BAMF

So its almost Halloween....(evil laugh)

Well, its almost that time of the year. We all get dressed up...get drunk...and make a few bad decisions. Yes folks, Halloween.


And the most important question...."what are you going to be for Halloween?"


Well my friends, I've thought about A LOT of things...


Here's the initial list first:

1. Cole Trickle (From Days of Thunder)
Hey, Its the South and NASCAR just seems to fit. Oh, and its one of the worst movies ever made.


2. United States Air Force "Pilot"
If you are not in the military, you might not understand...but these guy are the biggest bags of douche on the planet. Please, when bullets are flyin' and people are dyin'....give me a NAVAL AVIATOR...not one of these Air Force goons...


3. Ole Miss student
Apparently the seer-sucker suit is back in style in Oxford. Too easy.


4. Tyrone the Crackhead
Chappelle's Show fans...come on now....time to bring Tyrone Biggums BACK


5. My Boss (In the Army)
Normally this would be a no-no...but considering I have LITERALLY done his job in his absence on more than one occasion...even he would laugh.


6. Bill O'Reilly
I would wear a suit and tie....get hammered drunk...and just yell at everyone. And I mean EVERYONE. It could get out of control.


And the winner is....

I got about 50 volunteers (lower ranking individuals..hahaha)...and here's our idea.

We are going as....(drumroll)

THE NETWORK.

Thats right Verizon people....YOU.

I am just going to dress normal. And have out my cell phone. Behind me will be my sidekick "weatherboy", dressed as the Verizon-guy. And with him will be a bunch of randomly dressed people. THe token guy with the hard-hat...maybe a business suit or two....but a LARGE crowd.

And then?....I am just going to walk around the party talking to people.

When they ask "What the fuck is that behind you?!" I get to say. "Oh, thats my network"



Cheers,

-The BAMF

The VP debacle...I mean debate.

Oh my goodness.

I just finished watching the VP debate tonight...and I don't know if I want to throw up or maybe just have a fucking seizure.

Look, its not exactly a mystery that I am a Republican. That being said...I don't exactly know what the hell happened tonight. Really. It was like watching two kids with Down-Syndrome beat the shit out of each other on the playground. I did not want to watch...but I could not turn away.

Ok, lets talk Biden first. He's too easy. Like I said, I'm a Republican...I hated this douche by default. As one of my friends put it, "he looks like some evil character off of Veggie-Tales". Wow.
Ok Joe..there's left-wing..and then there is "whoa homie...you are off the map Tiger Woods" Come on back Joe. I think you have good intentions...you are just a crazy old fuck. I won't even talk about you anymore. Its TOO easy...

And on to Govenor Sarah Palin. First of all, I want to like you. Heck, you are kind of a "cougar" for a VP candidate. But damnit...your voice. AHHHHHHHHHHH. You sound like some yankee high school guidance counselor. It freaks me out. I halfway expect you to tell me I need to "apply myself in class" and "fill out my college applications soon."
There was one point were I just screamed at my TV like a crazy man. Just because you were talking.
Your voice...it hurts my soul.

The ONLY thing that made me survive that television experince was my friend Elle. She kept me laughing via Facebook. Elle, thank you. You saved me from throwing a large object THROUGH my very expensive TV.

People, don't be discouraged...I'm still voting for McCain...but damnit...Sarah, sweetheart...get your shit together...and maybe see a Speech Therapist...or better yet have an exorcism. And please..give me my sould back.


Out here,

-The BAMF

The US Navy impresses Freelance BAMF...

The United States Navy did something that IMPRESSES ME. That is right.

Mark those calendars....its a revolution bitches.

The men and women of VAW-113 (The "Black Eagles") are famous for making music videos on their 6 month deployments to various corners of the world.

Check this one out....it impressed me...




Hats off to these guys. We have to keep our sanity somehow when we are deployed.

Keep up the good work fellas....stay safe.

Out here,

The BAMF

Its been awhile...

Hey hey hey people. Your friendly neighborhood BAMF here.

Sorry its been awhile. Work has been STUPID-busy (google it). And of course...grad school is eating my soul.

Just a few updates...

Work: The Army. Its the Army people...nothing makes sense. And I have to get ready for a HUGE briefing this weekend for a 4-star...yes, 4-star general. Everyone keeps asking my team..."hey...are you guys ready?" Thats re-fucking-diculous. That is like trying to get ready to be kicked in the balls.

School: On the UPside...Grad school is rough, but then again..its supposed to be. I just navigate my way through the stupid sorostitute comments and general liberal douchbaggery.
Its a grand ol' time. Oh, and I got to see Colin Powell (GEN, USA Ret) speak last week. AMAZING. Why can't HE run for President? (sigh...)

Watch yourselves people. My RSP's made their own patch...hahaha.


More pictures of the "Arrrrrrmy Training" to come.

Out here,


The BAMF

9/11

Hey people.

The BAMF does not need to remind you about today. If you don't know what today is...well...time to venture out of your cave mmmk?

I'm not going to post a bunch of 9/11 stuff....I think there is enough of it out there...but I will do one thing for you guys today.

I'll reassure you.

There are still people in this world that want to hurt YOU. Yeah...you. There are plenty of terrorist groups, not just Al Qaeda (like Hamas) that would love to do something worse than the attacks of 9/11/01.

But people...don't lose any sleep over it.

There are plenty of people that stand ready to take the fight to the enemy. Whoever they may be...wherever they may be.

Alot of you guys know what I do in the Army.

But this video (BIG props to Zach for this one) is EXACTLY why Rangers do what they do....

The Ranger Creed.






That creed is not just something we memorize...or just something we say. We live by it.

So today, do me a favor...hug your kids. Go to a movie. Go out to dinner. Do whatever it is you do.

But above all...sleep well America. We're out here.


-The BAMF

Fred Thompson makes me smile.

People,
I don't know if any of you are fellow Republicans...but in case someone out there is....

DID YOU SEE FRED THOMPSON? Holy Shit.

Hands down best speech of the 2008 Election (by either party)


Fred, thank you for making me proud to be from your state...









-The BAMF